Parker Michael Nead. Born January 4th, 2015. 7 lbs 15 oz and 21 inches of pure love.
It was 4am in the morning when I felt the first contraction. It wasn't terrible, but they were very consistent. My husband and I hung out at the house all day. I watched back-to-back episodes of Love It or List It on HGTV, painted my nails, and got last minute chores done around the house. Around 4 in the afternoon was when they started getting more painful and closer together. I could still manage the pain, but they were 5 minutes apart and lasting a minute for over an hour. Our birthing teacher told us that is when we head to the hospital.
I was scheduled to be induced the following day, since Parker was almost a week late. I was so excited, I thought, THIS IS IT! I don't have to be induced. We headed to the hospital, bags and all, and checked in. They checked my cervix and sadly told me that I was only about 2 centimeters dilated. I told the nurse that I was able to manage the pain so far. I thought I had some sort of baby making super powers and I somehow wasn't going to feel those fall-to-the-floor contractions. HA! The nurse told me that until I can't speak and I'm grabbing on for dear life, to go ahead and come back then.
So, we shamelessly headed home. I was determined to stay in the house until I couldn't take it any longer. We get home, order pizza and get ice cream and get cozy on the couch. About two hours later I feel a contraction that was exactly like she described. I had no idea how I would handle the pain. I didn't know if I would scream, need my back rubbed, etc. I didn't want to be touched, I Just wanted to curl in a ball and continued to say "fart" over and over again as they got worse. I have NO idea where that came from. (And those "farts" slowly turned into "F***" followed by a "SORRY!") My husband thought that was great...
After an hour and a half of those, we headed back to the hospital. I got there and was 3 1/2 centimeters and got admitted. I didn't have a birth plan, I didn't have any parameters on what I did and didn't want. I tried to go in with no expectations. To my surprise I accepted any pain relieving concoctions they had. BRING IT ON. However, unfortunately none of those helped and I just kept throwing up... like everything I ate my entire pregnancy.
Epidural please! I opted to get one at 4 centimeters and thank GOD for that. I didn't want too much, so I made that clear. I wanted to feel my legs enough to push, so I made sure they didn't over do it. The relief was incredible. I couldn't believe I was still having those horrific contractions, but wasn't feeling the pain.
I couldn't sleep. I just sat there and stared at the ceiling. I let my husband sleep for a bit and then my Mom came to join us at the hospital. Next thing you knew I was at 7 centimeters. We called the rest of the family as we thought it could be any minute now. Everyone got there at about 5am. I started to push at about 1pm.
When the nurse told me to start pushing, I had no idea what to expect. I was scared, anxious, excited, and SO ready to meet the little booger that has been exercising in my belly for the last 9 months.
I pushed with everything I had. When the nurse said I was doing great and to keep doing those exact pushes, I did exactly that. That lasted about 20 minutes and then she told me to stop pushing since the doctor wasn't in the room yet. STOP PUSHING? It isn't that easy... my body couldn't stop pushing. It was wild. They were calling for the doctor for a bit and finally, about 10 minutes before I deliver, the doctor arrives. I just remember her saying GREAT PUSHING, you are about to meet your son! I felt like an A+ student. I thought they would make me go into all these different positions and delivery tactics- movie style.
I hear the doctor say, "Lindsay, in three pushes you are about to meet your son. I need these to be the hardest pushes yet." I remember physically feeling like it was impossible to push any harder and any longer. And then I realized, I had no other choice. I thought I couldn't do it, but my animal instincts kicked in high gear. Every part of my body was as tense as I have ever felt. My legs, my chest, my arms, my back... I'm still paying for that part.
Last push, and out came Parker. They passed him right over to me and I was in utter shock. I thought I would cry and it would be this big emotional event for me, but I couldn't even gather emotions. I was just in awe. He was so clean and perfect looking. Nothing even close to that horrifying discovery channel documentary I watched on birth.
I was shaking like crazy and saying over and over again how I couldn't believe he was here. I couldn't believe that we made him.
Creating a little life is the most incredible experience. I still can't believe it all. I had SO much anxiety in my 3rd trimester. I was so nervous of anything going wrong and all of the unknowns. But when you are in the heat of it all, you are so much stronger than you think. Women are incredible that way.
I have a whole new respect for mothers. Being a parent is the toughest, most rewarding experience. One minute you are sleep deprived and crying, and then next you are so full of love and joy and a sense of contentment that is hard to explain unless you are a parent.
And thank GOD for my husband. The most patient, helpful, comforting and loving man. He was incredible, the entire pregnancy. And seeing him as a father fills my heart with so much joy. I always knew he would be a great Dad, but seeing it in person brings tears to my eyes. It is the most beautiful thing.